Are You Approaching Your Divorce the Wrong Way?

a couple signing divorce papers

The stress and frustration associated with divorce can change the way you approach the process. It can make you behave unreasonably, causing you to make decisions that you’ll regret in the future. When you let emotions govern your actions, your divorce is then likely to be costlier and longer. This is especially true if you are willing to go to greater lengths just to get what you think is yours.

If you want to start your life (after divorce) with sufficient money and resources, you need to approach the process the right way and avoid the following mistakes:

Thinking that divorce is a game and that you’ll be the winner.

While there are two parties involved in a divorce, it is not a game, and there is no true winner and loser. This is true even if the case seems to be working in your favor. You and your spouse will have to compromise and settle on things that you are not initially comfortable with. You, for instance, may get the custody of the kids, but then receive less alimony (of what was originally requested).

Letting your spouse bully or take advantage of you.

Deciding to take the high road does not mean being submissive and allowing the other party to bully or trick you. Santa Fe divorce lawyers note that you still need to learn to defend yourself, especially if you’re dealing with a bully or a narcissistic spouse. An experienced divorce lawyer can give you’re the right kind of assistance while also protecting your rights.

Getting your children involved in the divorce.

The separation of mom and enough can affect kids in a lot of ways. This is why no matter how angry you are with the other parent, you shouldn’t put kids in the middle. Don’t use them as pawns or messengers and don’t bad-mouth your spouse. The best thing you can do is to protect their interest by being a responsible parent.

Expecting things to be fair.

Meanings are in people, and so is the definition of the word “fair”. This is why you cannot expect your definition of fair to be synonymous with what the other party or the divorce court thinks. If your case, for instance, goes to court or trial, the decision of the judge may be opposite to what you believe is fair. Do take note that divorce courts take into the consideration the long-term impact of a settlement decision.

The way you approach divorce can have a long-term effect on your future life after divorce. Be sure to focus on things that matter the most and think about the consequences of your actions. Work with an experienced divorce attorney to make sure that your rights are protected.